Tuesday, 2 December 2008

Love and maybe something not yet defined

“….and I wanna play hide and seek and give you my clothes, tell you I love your shoes, sit on the steps while you take a bath… and massage your neck and kiss your face, and hold your hand, and go for a walk, talk about the day, laugh at your…your paranoia. And give you tapes you don’t listen to, watch great films, watch terrible films, and tell you about the TV program I saw a night before, and not laugh at your jokes.
Want you in the morning, but let you sleep in for a while. Tell you how much I love your eyes, your lips, your neck........ Sit on the steps smoking till your neighbors come home, and sit on the steps smoking till you come home… and worry when you’re late, and be amazed when you’re early, go to a party and dance…be sorry when I’m wrong and happy when you forgive me. Look at your photos and wish I’d known you forever. Hearing your voice in my ear, feel your skin on my skin. And get scared when you’re angry, and hug you when you’re anxious, and hold you when you’re hurt. And want you when I smell you, and offend you when I touch you, and whimper when I’m with you, and whimper when I’m not, smother you in the night, and get cold when you take the blanket, and hot when you don’t. And melt when you smile, dissolve when you laugh…
But not understand how you think I’m rejecting you, when I’m not rejecting you. And wonder how you could think I’d ever reject you! And wonder who you are, but accept you anyway. And buy you presents you don’t want…and take them away again. I wander the city thinking it’s empty without you, but I want what you want, and I think I’m loosing myself But… but, but …but tell you the worst of me and try to give you the best of me. Because…. you don’t deserve any less.
Answer your questions when I’d rather not, and tell you the truth when I really don’t want to. And try to be honest because I know you prefer it. And think it’s all over but… hang on just for 10 more minutes before you throw me out of your life, forget who I am and let me try to get closer to you. And somehow… somehow… Somehow communicate some of the overwhelming, undying, overpowering, unconditional, all encompassing, heart-enriching, mind-expanding, ongoing, never-ending love I have for you!”
… and after all, we might think the same…

Monday, 1 December 2008

Memory


We are all lost in memory. It is not a place that has been mapped, fixed by coordinates of longitude and latitude, whereby we can retrace a step and come to the same place again. Each time is different.